Does anyone else find themselves compelled to watch TLC’s programs? It doesn’t really matter if it’s “What Not to Wear” or a five hour marathon of “Jon and Kate Plus 8” I often lose hours of my life watching other people redecorate their living rooms thanks to TLC.
Yesterday I stumbled upon Paul McKenna’s new show, “I Can Make You Thin”. I of course watched it because, come on who doesn’t want to be thin? And if the becoming thin sounds like it involves magic? Just try and stop me.
So I watched Mr. Mckenna excitedly explain his four golden rules to weight loss success to a room full teary-eyed chubby people like myself. These are his golden rules: 1. Eat when you’re hungry, 2. Eat what you want, 3. Eat consciously, and 4. Stop when your full. Sounds kind of crazy, right? Eat what I want? What if I want French fries and brownies and pasta, oh glorious pasta! McKenna says cool man just chew it all 20 times while wearing a blind fold and were golden. Seriously though, it sounds more like he can make me constipated. Also, have you ever tried to chew your food twenty times? I did. My poor chicken nugget completely disintegrated well before I reached the magic chew number of twenty. I was left feeling like I should be looking for some baby birds to feed.
One food this would definitely work with: Cube Steak, which if you don’t chew it a good twenty times you can always play swallow the bite whole with your friends. Whoever requires the Heimlich maneuver first loses! *
I’ll give him this though his excitement is rather infectious. By the end of the hour I was vowing to never deny myself Ben and Jerry’s again. But a couple of times I thought he came off a bit pushy. Like with that poor mother of three who was his demonstration gal. He gives her macaroni and then proceeds to watch her eat it, instructing her to place the fork down in between bights and to chew it s-l-o-w-l-y, but after every bight he would lean in all earnest like and say, “Do you feel it?” and “Are you full?” over and over when you could tell the lady just wanted to scream I’m still on my third noodle man, would you just let me enjoy my mac and cheese!
It was interesting though and I would be lying if I said I didn’t tear up when he brought the Indian lady out as his success story. She seemed so darn happy I wanted give her a high five. Skepticism aside, I’m so watching him again. Besides according to his website he can also “Make You Confident!” and “Make You Stop Smoking!” and he’s apparently some kind of guru to the stars. He also alludes to a mind-programming CD so he could also be trying to take over the world. Or make us all cluck like chickens at inappropriate times. Either way, how is that not entertaining?
So that’s one more show to add to TLC’s shamefully addictive line-up. Alright, I’m going to go not deny myself a baked potato now.
*This blog does not endorse swallowing your food whole unless you are a snake, in which case carry on.
Yesterday I stumbled upon Paul McKenna’s new show, “I Can Make You Thin”. I of course watched it because, come on who doesn’t want to be thin? And if the becoming thin sounds like it involves magic? Just try and stop me.
So I watched Mr. Mckenna excitedly explain his four golden rules to weight loss success to a room full teary-eyed chubby people like myself. These are his golden rules: 1. Eat when you’re hungry, 2. Eat what you want, 3. Eat consciously, and 4. Stop when your full. Sounds kind of crazy, right? Eat what I want? What if I want French fries and brownies and pasta, oh glorious pasta! McKenna says cool man just chew it all 20 times while wearing a blind fold and were golden. Seriously though, it sounds more like he can make me constipated. Also, have you ever tried to chew your food twenty times? I did. My poor chicken nugget completely disintegrated well before I reached the magic chew number of twenty. I was left feeling like I should be looking for some baby birds to feed.
One food this would definitely work with: Cube Steak, which if you don’t chew it a good twenty times you can always play swallow the bite whole with your friends. Whoever requires the Heimlich maneuver first loses! *
I’ll give him this though his excitement is rather infectious. By the end of the hour I was vowing to never deny myself Ben and Jerry’s again. But a couple of times I thought he came off a bit pushy. Like with that poor mother of three who was his demonstration gal. He gives her macaroni and then proceeds to watch her eat it, instructing her to place the fork down in between bights and to chew it s-l-o-w-l-y, but after every bight he would lean in all earnest like and say, “Do you feel it?” and “Are you full?” over and over when you could tell the lady just wanted to scream I’m still on my third noodle man, would you just let me enjoy my mac and cheese!
It was interesting though and I would be lying if I said I didn’t tear up when he brought the Indian lady out as his success story. She seemed so darn happy I wanted give her a high five. Skepticism aside, I’m so watching him again. Besides according to his website he can also “Make You Confident!” and “Make You Stop Smoking!” and he’s apparently some kind of guru to the stars. He also alludes to a mind-programming CD so he could also be trying to take over the world. Or make us all cluck like chickens at inappropriate times. Either way, how is that not entertaining?
So that’s one more show to add to TLC’s shamefully addictive line-up. Alright, I’m going to go not deny myself a baked potato now.
*This blog does not endorse swallowing your food whole unless you are a snake, in which case carry on.
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